Distinction: SF coaching vs. "being positive"

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Comment by Jesper H Christiansen on June 23, 2009 at 21:56

Hi Paolo
Thanks for the fine small twist that (to me) gives it a SF touch.

Jesper

Comment by Paolo Terni on June 20, 2009 at 15:13

Hi Jesper!

You write: "But an invitation to change perspective on a situation - is that a positive spin?"
What do you think? Because the way you stated it, i am not sure...

I would have answered no, if you just had framed the question a little bit differently:"but an invitation to EXPLORE DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES on a situation - is that a positive spin?"

Ciao!!

Comment by Jesper H Christiansen on June 19, 2009 at 17:16

Ok, didn't get that point at first - you're right.
But an invitation to change perspective on a situation - is that a positive spin?
Like: "What if the other part was trying to achieve something good although it seems not to be appropriate from where you stand?".

Cheers
Jesper
PS I am off now for the weekend and can't respond untill Monday. -> Take care!

Comment by Paolo Terni on June 19, 2009 at 15:16

Hi Jesper!

yes, most definitely: good intentions sometimes are not reflected in actual behaviors, and many behaviors (according to NLP, it is useful to presuppose that ALL behaviors do) have positive intentions at their roots.

But it is the client that has to do that shift - and he or she cannot do it if I try to put a positive spin on it.

Ciao,
Paolo

Cheers,
Paolo

Comment by Jesper H Christiansen on June 19, 2009 at 14:44

Thanks Paolo!
At SOL summer university in Budapest 2007 one of my SF insights were:
'Conflicts is missing coordination between good intentions'. If looking at conflicts that way it helps me (and involved people) to approach something that stresses and hurts in an alternative ressourceful way.
That is saying: What could be behind that negative situation that is trying to do some good?
Respecting everybody involved as persons not trying to do harm but is somehow obstructed in their ways of doing good.

Jesper