Sharing and building Solution Focused practice in organisations
Coaching Pace
I notice a relationship about learning a skill and how quickly/slowly this becomes "my style" ( I hang around with a lot of musicians and see this in action). I've learnt my coaching approach through donkey's years of individual work (Rogerian - I used to be a Social Worker), supporting managers in difficulty (god knows what I was using here - some best practice/common sense HR approach) and other coaching models. Over the last couple of years it's the SF stuff which floats my boat fro reasons that you'll understand.
I have a format for the SF coaching which won't be unfamiliar to you. Over the last couple of weeks I've been working with a director in a medium sized private company who seems VERY HUNGRY for his own learning and really likes to work fast. The 90 mins goes very quickly and we seem to be working on 6 things at once. As well as helping him to be fully aware and utilising his leadership strengths he is seeking different ways of understanding his situation and in many ways wants a chance to consider the leadership models that are out there (this will probably lead me onto another thread - why am I disappointed when I'm not as SF as I'd like to be....)
The thing is that I've got no time to reflect with this guy, no time to frame questions as carefully as I'd like, it just comes blurting out - in jazz music terms it's an improvisation rather than a structured solo (and I'm perhaps more comfortable with a bit of both)
It's going really well though - he and his company love it and I'm likely to get further work : - )
Anyone else relate to this? Best hopes - I don't know, just want to hear that others have experienced this and get their thoughts
Views: 110
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Paul Z Jackson on
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Hi Phil
You say he's hungry for his own learning and likes to work fast - and that is precisely what he is getting from your skilled improvisations with him. And they love it. Sounds good all round.
Perhaps one way of adding your more reflective questions is to have one or two in mind before the session begins, and see how they manifest themselves during the conversation?
Cheers, Paul -
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Permalink Reply by Phil Jones on
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Thanks Paul - yes I think you're right...Like a lot of motivated clients I have he does want to check from time to time that he is being a "good coachee". This prompts me to do even more affirming and feedback about how well he's doing. Quite often this comes after a period of tension around (a rare) moment of silence
Cheers
Phil -
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Permalink Reply by Janine Waldman on
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Hi Phil
How about creating more moments of silence by taking a short break towards the end of the session (as Steve and Insoo did and many SF therapists and some coaches do). To give you both time to reflect and for you to spend a few minutes gathering your thoughts and deciding on further affirms and feedback.
All the best
Janine -
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Hiya - yes I'm seeing him tomorrow and will give it a go
For me the work has highlighted three areas, one of which relating to Janine's post
- my fairly narrow comfort zone in terms of pace - it's quicker than I've got time to think about and therefore I'm just being. When am I at my most comfortable about this? Is it comfort I'm seeking?
- my client has said that he wants to change his approach. By working at this breakneck speed he is doing what he always does
- In Honey and Mumford terms I'm a bit of a reflector and I value the H and M work and Kolb too. He doesn't seem to want to reflect - who am I to tell him that it's good for him?
It's fun
Phil -
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Permalink Reply by Agneta Castenberg on
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Hi
I was thinking in the same line as Janine Steve de Shazer was also a jazz musician and i remember him saying there are no music without silences.
Cheers Agneta -
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